Living with a speech problem

I’ve been unable to speak properly all my life, I’ve had years of speech therapy but it hasn’t worked, one bit. I have dyspraxia but I have not officially been told if it’s linked to my dyspraxia. Something has to have caused me to not be able to speak, but no consultant has found out why. I can’t pronounce certain letters like G, Q, K, V and others. I also stutter so much and speak very fast, people say I speak too fast so much, but I can’t control it. I wish I could.

I get annoyed with myself so often for not being able to pronounce things properly, and when people ask me to repeat what I said – everybody does this, even family (I can’t blame them for asking, if they don’t understand something, they would ask as they want to know). I get so angry with myself but I need to learn to not, but it’s a really hard thing to learn, hopefully, I’ll get the hang of it one day. I can’t help that I have a speech problem, but my god.. what I’d do to just get rid of it somehow.

Countless years of speech therapy, attempting so many different methods and it’s not worked.  If I remember correctly, I didn’t learn to speak until pretty late, like 5 or 6?

My life with a speech problem has been hard, it is the cause of my social anxiety (80% certain) Bullying, people asking you to repeat every single thing most of the time. It’s certainly very frustrating.

Bullying has been a big problem, especially in high school, I expected it to be honest, but it was constant throughout high school. Comments, people purposely not pronouncing things right when I come into the room, or into the area. People mimicking me, telling me to “learn to speak properly” A comment which has been said many, many times. If I could… learn” I’d actually love to be able to speak properly, it’d change my life, completely. It has been something which people just seem to notice and say things about, it stops me from going out because I am scared of people not understanding me, people saying things and judging me.

I wish I could speak properly like people can do. It’s something that has affected my life in many ways, it has made me have so low self-esteem, it’s made me scared of going out, and possibly the cause of most of my MH problems really. If I was able to speak properly, would I not be so afraid of what people think about me? Who knows…

 

Liam

 

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7 Responses to Living with a speech problem

  1. iwritedid says:

    The problem you talk about is very understandable.Thank you for this insight giving post. I wonder whether you could give recommendations to others how to react. The reactions they mention on your speech problem are so disgusting and stupid to hear. I can very much understand how you have a double problem, that you describe, both with yourself … like” if I could talk better it would change life so much” and with outsiders who behave so terribly. I both hope you would be able to find somewhere speech therapy and it would become better understood. Sometimes you meet people with a speech problem and though you know this must be hard life, you describe it very well, I hope other people change by more awareness about this. Wish you the best in this, Jim

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    • I am tempted to try and get speech therapy again, but with me having a lot of it, and it not working, I am not confident it’d work, to be honest!

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      • iwritedid says:

        I am sorry to hear that. But you are not gonna just let it be this way, i assume? Are there no options to get good treatment for anxiety, reducing or solving speech problems only in the second place, so placing speech problems in a wider spectrum of causes than only focusing on the outcome of better speech. I’m sorry to hear you tried so much, I hope you find someone that is able to help you in this.

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  2. I probably will have to let it be this way to be honest. I suffer with MH issues and having therapy for it but not my speech

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  3. This is such an honest, post Liam. What a horrible thing to have to go through. People are rude and mean. It must be hard to ignore them but I hope you can try your best because there is nothing wrong with you! People are just rude and ignorant. I bet you opening up about this will have helped others too. People just need to be patient and I’m sure the people who love you understand how difficult and frustrating it is for you. Sending lots of love xx

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  4. Sam says:

    Hey I’m so sorry about this. I have a friend with CP that stutters. He tries to not let it get to him but it does sometimes interfere with things like phone calls and people trying to finish his words for him. Would some kind of communication AP be helpful like proloque to go?

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